CREST, n. An heraldic device displayed by the American descendants of Sir Crassus Vulgarius, Bearonet, one of the famous retainers of William the Corncurer.
Son of ten fathers! would you sport a crest
To honor one, ignoring all the rest —
The one who in his life you did disgrace
By taking on his name without his face?
His crest? The only one he knew, poor fool,
Adorned the dunce-cap that he wore at school.
Go paint a dandelion and a rag
Upon your panels, and then gravely brag
About their origin — how every panel
Proves that the founder of your line was Dan’l,
Who, cast among the lions’ growling pack,
Contemptuously turned on them his back;
But one presuming brute, tradition teaches,
Tore with his tooth the seat of Dan’l’s breeches.
‘Twas thus the dent de lion and the rag
Became the arms of that illustrious wag.
And ever since each male of Dan’l’s line,
Yourself included, as a pious sign
And token of his Scriptural descent,
Has worn a rag protruding from a rent.